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Tuesday 19 September 2017

10 LUDICROUSLY EXPENSIVE APPS

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10 Ludicrously Expensive Apps
By Robert Grimminck,
Toptenz, 18 September 2017.

Apps are great because they are pieces of software that are usually relatively cheap, especially considering 20 years ago similar programs would have cost 100 times more and wouldn’t have worked nearly as well. In fact, most aren’t just cheap; a vast majority of apps in both the Apple’s App Store and Google Play are free. But not all apps are low in price. Here are 10 of the most ludicrously expensive apps you can buy. Though, as you’ll soon see…why would you?

10. Super Color Runner: US$200

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In Google Play there are dozens, if not hundreds of games where you run along an endless path and avoid obstacles. There are two things that set Super Color Runner apart from those games. The first is that “Rather than running down a single endless path in this game you have to fill up four paths with energy.” The point of the game is to stay alive by collecting enough “energy pellets” to keep your batteries charged. The second difference is that Super Color Runner costs US$200 to download, which is about US$200 more expensive than a majority of the other running games.

The designer wrote that he plans to update the game in the near future, but the last update was in 2012, so we don’t recommend holding your breath on that one.

9. The Most Expensive App(s): US$400

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The Most Expensive App ( Danger ) prides itself on being nothing more than a waste of money. Or as they like to put it, it allows you to show your status in life.

The app does nothing else but show you a message congratulating you on downloading the app and patting you on the back for being rich, saying you deserve it. A message also pops up saying “Hey Rich guy…what is up ???” Because there is nothing like paying US$400 for an app and then getting a spam-like message from it.

Amazingly, it has a perfect five star rating, albeit just one person rated it. A similar app that does even less than the Most Expensive App ( Danger ), called The Most Expensive App (Im Rich) has 152 five-star ratings. The I’m Rich version of the app just has an icon with a diamond on it that does nothing when you press it. But we guess if you say the app does nothing, and then you deliver on that, it must be worth a five-star rating.

We’re wondering: wouldn’t something like US$400 shoes be a better way to show off your cash flow? How many people see your phone screen and actually pay attention to your apps? People may not notice your shoes, either, but at least they serve a function. They’re particularly good for kicking people who waste their money on this app.

8. DDS GP Yes!: US$699.99

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To become a dentist, you have to get an undergraduate degree and then there are four years of dentistry school. So they know a lot about teeth, and trying to explain what they have to do to their patients’ teeth can be a difficult task. That’s where the terribly named DDS GP Yes! app comes in. It’s an iOS app that allows the dentist to show patients procedures, and what the results will be afterwards. It also shows what would happen without treatment, similar to what Lisa Simpson saw in the episode where she needs braces.

The app also contains about 80 minutes of lessons for the dentists to explain conditions and treatment plans, and it recommends methods to help influence patients so that they make better decisions regarding their dental health.

For all that, it costs US$699.99. According to the developer’s website, the app is used in 13,000 dental clinics.

7. QSFFStats: US$999.99

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Some apps, like Candy Crush Saga, are made for mass appeal. The developers, or whoever owns the game, give it away for free and try to sell you stuff inside the game. Other apps are made to fill niches where only certain people will find it useful or interesting. These apps are usually a bit more expensive because apps aren’t cheap to make; they can cost tens of thousands of dollars, if not over a hundred thousand, and the developers need to recoup their money somehow.

That could explain why QSFFStats is so expensive, because it’s one of the most niche apps around. It’s an iPhone app that isn’t available in the app store, but its purpose is for people to track stats in their flag football league. To do that, it will set you back US$999.99. Yes, all those stats that can easily be tracked by a spreadsheet, which are free through Google Docs, is available in an app that costs a grand. Seems like a solid investment to us.

6. app.Cash: US$999.99

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app.Cash is a point-of-sale, or POS, application that says it is for “all purposes” in Apple’s App Store, but when you visit the website, it’s actually meant to be used in restaurants, and hotels with restaurants. While US$999.99 may sound like a lot for an app, it appears that it is a one-time purchase.

Other POS systems, like Light POS Inc., offer the app for free, but then charge anywhere from US$69 to US$198 a month to use their system. So while app.Cash may be one of the most expensive apps available, it’s actually quite a steal in terms of POS systems.

5. I Am Rich: US$999.99


The first “status symbol” app was the I Am Rich app, developed by Armin Heinrich. It was for the first generation of iPhone and went on sale on August 5, 2008, for US$999.99, which was the maximum price for an app.

“The red icon on your iPhone or iPod touch always reminds you (and others when you show it to them) that you were able to afford this.
It’s a work of art with no hidden function at all.
After pressing the (i) on the main page, a secret mantra will be shown. This may help you to stay rich, healthy and successful.”
As for the mantra, it said:
I am rich
I deserv it
I am good,
healthy & successful
Yes, you read that right: deserve was spelled incorrectly in the mantra. So apparently Heinrich was targeting rich people with low self-esteem who didn’t care about spelling or grammar.

Amazingly, within hours, eight people purchased the app, but not everyone was happy about it. One person thought it was a joke and downloaded it, and he was shocked to see that Apple charged US$999.99 to his credit card, so he wrote a scathing review.

Without explanation, the app was taken down the next day. Apple then released lengthy guidelines for their apps, and apps like I Am Rich are no longer allowed in Apple’s App Store (though this very app was later made available at a much lower price, still as dumb and pointless as ever).

In total, Heinrich made about US$5,600 from the app and Apple was paid US$2,400, but had to refund two people, so they only netted US$400.

4. LogMeIn Ignition: US$1,399.99

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One of the most expensive apps available is found in the Apple App Store: the LogMeIn Ignition app, which you can get for your iPhone or iPad…but it will set you back US$1,399.99. The app allows you to access the files and apps that are on your computer or tablet from your phone. That’s right, for the price of new computer or several tablets, the app allows you to access another computer or tablet through a different smart device.

In Google Play, the app is free. However, they charge a membership which is US$250 a year for access to two computers. So we guess that’s a deal?

3. CyberTuner: US$1,399.99

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The CyberTuner app from Reyburn Piano Service, Inc. is for a very niche market - professional piano tuners. It turns out that piano tuning software isn’t exactly cheap. One of the more reasonably priced applications is about US$300. The CyberTuner is the most expensive piano tuning software and they call themselves the gold standard in the field.

They sell the app for US$1,399.99, which is more than double the price of their closest competitor. They justify their price because they say that it is easy to use. Well, we sure hope it is, since it’d be a real kick in the head if it was complicated and crashed all the time at that price.

2. iVIP Black: US$1,399.99

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iVIP Black is an app for millionaires. Literally. You can only access the services available on the app if you can prove that you have a net worth of US$1.28 million. Once you do, you’ll have access to what is essentially a Groupon for rich people. This includes getting deals on rich people things, like butlers and private jets. As freelance writers, we know all to well about these things.

The good news for you Android users that have over US$1.28 million: the app is free for you, but you still have to prove you’re rich, and there is a subscription.

1. Abu Moo: US$400 - US$2,400

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How useful an app is sometimes comes down to the individual. If you work out a lot, there are a considerable amount of apps that will help you get the most out your exercises. Or there are apps that will help you save money on groceries, and other apps have McDonald’s delivered to your house so you never have to grocery shop again. Not to mention how many games there are that are great time wasters.

Many of these apps are completely free, and others cost about much as however much change you’ve got in your pocket. But for the most part, they do tend to serve some type of function.

Now we get to the most expensive app available, which is Abu Moo. Well, technically it’s six different versions of the same app…but you want to be a completist and collect them all, right?

Abu Moo is a series of six apps that are available in Google Play. The apps are US$400 each, so it’s US$2,400 for the set, which are just six different pictures of rings. When you download the apps and install them, a picture of the gem stone appears on your phone. That’s it.

So, uh…maybe do something better with your money, like donate it to charity? That seems like a better thing to do. Yeah, do that instead.

Top image credit: geralt/Pixabay.

[Source: Toptenz. Top image added.]

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